Four Years In the Journey.

Written on
11/4/2013

STEP by STEP...remembering the Blessings:
Four years ago this was what I shared as I said, "See you later" to the love of my life.  Sometimes it still seems surreal that someone can be such a significant part of your life, and in a moment everything changes. We were blessed with an additional 12 years with Bonnie from the time we first encountered the challenge of living with cancer.  So, as November becomes the month to be intentionally thankful here in the United States, and while I still deeply miss Bonnie, my heart is filled with a spirit of thankfulness.

The day we first heard the word cancer, I still remember returning to my office at Western Michigan University, and one of the VP's asking how I was doing, and with no words, tears just flowed down my face. His response was, "Let's go into my office."

I still remember after three times within about three years.

I still remember wondering and questioning why would we use an Alternative Medicine Doctor...yet after a year of having him treat Bonnie, scans see NO SIGNS of cancer whatsoever... It was hard to believe, and we were thanking God for an extra lease on life.

I still remember in 2009 when the health struggles increasing, and yet no one could come up with a life sustaining solution.

I still remember the people who mowed lawns, provided child care, administered IV's, made dinners, secretly bought her first wig, gave us a vehicle, had garage sales, cleaned our home, provided rides for McKenzie, raised funds, and gave concerts.

I still remember the hundreds who prayed and gave us the gift of their time, a phone call or just being  with us.

I still remember Bonnie’s last night on this side of eternity, when, while I sang to her the same song that I had sung to her in our wedding, she slipped into the arms of Jesus.

I still remember the love, support, and prayers from friends and strangers.

I still have experienced God's faithfulness through the years, as expressed by many of you when we  left friends and memories in AZ and ventured further west to join a great faith community at New Life Community Church.  

Life is exciting and a blessing.  Though we are still missing a significant part of our lives, we continue to move forward, creating new memories, allowing God to use us.  We laugh, we cry, and can say with integrity and genuineness It is well with my soul.

Tonight we remembered Bonnie by having Sushi for dinner.  Something I'm rather confident she would not have enjoyed.  Normally we would have chosen a restaurant Bonnie like,  but at the last minute we both wanted it (RA had Happy Hour) so we cerated a new memory, doing something mom would not have done while combining it with Happy Hour which she would have loved saving the money.  I even splurged and had a soda (not a diet one) and tried to use chop sticks.  On the way home I shared with McKenzie that what I miss most is all the new adventures Mom would have loved here in CA.  Bonnie was always about 'making a memory'.  God used Bonnie to touch so many lives.  I'm grateful to have had her influence in my life and in our family.  Thanks for taking the steps with us...